October 23, 2015

Don't move to New York City!

Gavin McInnesArchive

New York City is a popular location for TV and movies but it shouldn't be a popular location to you.


I'm not saying that the way they say "Don't move here" during SXSW in Austin. I'm saying it for your benefit. Here are five reasons you're better off where you are.

Giant megalomaniacs who only talk about themselves and treat women worse than ISIS. Most men here have "a spare and a pair" and they all think they're the only one.

It's a city filled with desperate spinsters hunting for a man and pretending their dog will quell their biological clock. By the time they realize it's all a lie, the deadline has passed.

Thinking you'll kick ass in NYC is even dumber than thinking you're going to become a movie star in LA. Not even corporate lawyers, salesman, and finance guys are guaranteed a job. You don't have that expertise. You're doomed.

Making enough money to be middle class means you never see your family and pretty much every waking moment is devoted to hustling.

Rats and roaches are not a stereotype. They are an everyday part of New York Life. The human beings who populate the place aren't much better.

READ Gavin McInnes' "gut-punchingly hilarious" memoir "The Death of Cool"

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commented 2015-10-27 02:08:50 -0400
New Jersey is a very varied state part NYC, part Philly, with a great coast ample farmlands,mountains in the northwest and immense wealth, don’t lump it in with Connecticut and The People’s Republic of Kennedyland.
commented 2015-10-25 22:49:43 -0400
New York City is hellhole, but to be honest, that whole region, New Jersey, Connecticut, Massachussets is about the same. Lots of “I’ll soo ya” type losers, they’re the least friendly on the continent… A lot of the folks there suffer from the same thing the British have, inability to pronouce the letter ‘r’…

They’re also the least American, they hate guns, love taxes, love regulations and rules. There’s a reason the United Nations chose New York to be “the world’s city”.
commented 2015-10-25 21:11:40 -0400
Don’t worry, I wouldn’t even go there let alone move there.
commented 2015-10-24 12:26:18 -0400
Yeah, but there is an energy about a big city. Being more of an ‘out of town’ sort of person, I find I need a blast of that ‘big city’ energy once in a while. Couldn’t live there for too long though.
commented 2015-10-24 10:53:54 -0400
If you’re going to live in the city you have to adjust for the fact that there are a number of people who just don’t understand that children aren’t adults. They should be in bed. When my babies were young I’d frequently have to go to the nearby 24/7 drugstore to get whatever, and without fail it would be full of people with their children, on a school night…past 11 at night. EVERY TIME. For people in the real America, the drugstore is just this place you go to go get a prescription filled and a few odds and ends that you may need, band aids, something to drink. No big whoop. In the city the drugstore is kind of like the water hole in the Serengeti. There are goings on at all hours. People buy a weeks worth of groceries there. You’ll be on line for 40 minutes because there’s some sort of dispute about a coupon. There are children running around screaming at the top of their lungs. There’s a person outside who once in a moment of drunken weakness you gave a dollar to who now expects that to be the norm…forever. And they get weird if you don’t give it.

The rent is high. The food is expensive. The air is gross. The people are remote and cold. There’s no parking. The subway is crowded and full of weirdo’s. There’s an air of hostility toward you in a lot of areas because you’re the wrong race. The people are like I said, cold and frequently snobs. The people think they’re smarter than you but there’s no real reason why. You don’t really love art as much as you think you do and so what if you do. It’s still no reason to pay 35oo$ a month to live in a shoe box with 4 other upset, difficult, weird other people.
commented 2015-10-24 09:21:04 -0400
Most frightening part of Gavin’s NYC exposé, is that you’ll suffer the same fate in every other god damn city in America. You can only trade in the rat problem but you may get worse. Don’t go to the cities east of San Diego and south of the 35th parallel because if the heat doesn’t destroy your soul the mega-churches will. West coast is out for traffic, and if you did make it there you would be regulated until you’re penniless. All NE cities please refer to the video above. This leaves us with upper Midwest. Ever been to Chicago in the winter? Throw a dart at the calendar and there is an 80% chance it’s winter, 90% for Cleveland and Minneapolis. Shit, I think I just sent everyone to Salt Lake City. I miss the good ole days when all the “tall dicks and vapid cunts” went to NYC so the rest of us could enjoy humanity.
commented 2015-10-23 23:31:34 -0400
You just don’t want New York to be flooded with people fleeing the Wynne/Justine regime.
commented 2015-10-23 16:04:06 -0400
LMAO – it sounds exactly like Mad Men.
commented 2015-10-23 15:11:08 -0400
I’ve been to New York City. The stereotypes are true. I now viscerally understand why Americans think Canadians are so nice. New Yorkers can be some of the rudest people around.
commented 2015-10-23 14:33:28 -0400

NYC sucks – totally.
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