November 20, 2016

Ecosexuals: Banging trees for Mother Earth, but “what about the thorny issue of consent?”

David MenziesMission Specialist

We recently reported that New York City officially recognizes 31 genders, but now it looks like they’ll have to bump that up to 32 to accommodate the newest gender identity: the ecosexual.


An ecosexual is a hardcore environmentalist who has romantic feelings for Mother Earth and believes they can save the planet by having sex with plants.

Recently a number of them gathered in Sydney, Australia where they romped with vegetation and each other in a shag-shack called the Ecosexual Bathhouse.

In a media report, renowned expert Amanda Morgan of the University of Nevada described the activities of a typical ecosexual thus:

“There are people who roll around in the dirt having an orgasm covered in potting soil. There are people who f*** trees, or [pleasure themselves] under a waterfall.”

We used to call people like this exhibitionists, perverts or just garden-variety insane but don’t do that today unless you want a visit from your friendly neighbourhood human rights commissioner.

Some 100,000 people the world over gender-identify as ecosexual, so it’s now a protected gender identity like straight, gay, bi, trans, two-spirit, fluid, non-binary, you name it.

It’s none of my beeswax what aroused environmentalists do in the privacy of their own rose gardens but has anyone considered the thorny issue of consent?

What if that weeping willow wants nothing to do with your mammalian sex organ penetrating its roots, and how exactly does one go about courting an inanimate plant any way?

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commented 2016-11-22 11:47:40 -0500
The rape culture in action. Oh ,the vegemanity!
commented 2016-11-21 13:24:22 -0500
Well at least they aren’t eco-feminists with that MEN ARE PIGS!!!…pigs…pigs…pigs…pigs…reverberating down the eco-chamber.

This is kind of like an eco-feminist slut walk….
commented 2016-11-21 11:17:01 -0500
Ah, David, you’re a bit off in your calculations. IF the “Mother” earth is female then some of these ecosexuals need to be parsed a bit finer. So some will be lesbian (i.e. same sex) practitioners. Some will be “straight”. Some will be trans veggies etc. And the list goes on and on and on and……
commented 2016-11-21 06:48:43 -0500
Hey folks, how about carbonsexuals ? Come out of the closet, it’s time to show the world that you love carbon. It is the building blocks of life, the more the better, with more carbon we’d have more plant growth for the ecosexuals .
commented 2016-11-21 01:33:00 -0500
John Williams – the great bard himself could have written no greater farce. ;-)

“In individuals, insanity is rare; but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule.” – Friedrich Nietzsche
commented 2016-11-21 01:32:59 -0500
John Williams – the great bard himself could have written no greater farce. ;-)

“In individuals, insanity is rare; but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule.” – Friedrich Nietzsche
commented 2016-11-21 01:11:55 -0500
JAN G said “I wonder what David Suzuki thinks of these people.”
Hell he’s been banging fruit flies for decades.
commented 2016-11-21 00:16:10 -0500
The woman with the alfalfa sprout mask is looking at me kinda hot. I think I want those alfalfa sprouts in my mouth. Am I an ecosexual? I’m so confused. Eveyone is telling me its not cool to masterbate in the bushes. Are they facists for not thinking its cool. Probably. Because anyone should be able to hump anything in their vegetable crisper without the stigma of being branded a weirdo. Human rights councils and the UN should fight for these people. I blame white males for this racist, anti-Semitic, xen·o·pho·bic, attack on those who simply want make love to there perky, alluring salad. Won’t someone think of the children?
commented 2016-11-20 21:34:50 -0500
New Age beliefs are certainly contributing to the mass confusion of what God is versus the stars being aligned. Luckily, we are able to learn about people with such bizarre behavior. Otherwise, the tree would simply fall in the forest and no one would have heard it.

I wonder what David Suzuki thinks of these people.
commented 2016-11-20 21:26:15 -0500
Can’t wait to see an ecosexual in rosebush.
commented 2016-11-20 20:25:27 -0500
I have news for all you “it’s all about me” progressives, many diseases have their basis in deviant behavior , you can make it legal to screw kids and plants and animals all you want, if nature does not think you should be doing this then nature will punish you in natures way. And sorry but nature does not care about the race card or any other progressive whining. If doing this gives you some disease then you damn well deserve it.
commented 2016-11-20 20:22:44 -0500
Why is it every demented fetish has to be showcased by the practitioners? If i were to bang my woman in the outdoors i would get arrested.
commented 2016-11-20 20:20:14 -0500
So is it still a crime to jam a wooden stick up someones ass if they are an ecosexual?
commented 2016-11-20 18:28:04 -0500
That is not what I meant——— It was this one—— It is pretty mundane nowadays———
commented 2016-11-20 17:36:41 -0500
“The world has gone bat shit crazy.”

damn right it has Philip. I’m contemplating moving out of the city and to the sticks – as far away from any human being as possible. When society goes this insane, you have to know it isn’t going to end well – but it is going to end soon.
commented 2016-11-20 15:58:43 -0500
@ Marty – “Agreed, but how do we cleanse it?”

Al Peterson said it best … well, I guess he quoted it best. I was referring to a spiritual revival, a return back to our Christian roots as a society.
commented 2016-11-20 15:29:07 -0500
There are 3 types of end times pointed out in the bible , I believe we’re in the last hour !

As of and starting about 2 or 3 years ago nothing surprises me anymore , but I do get a jolt every once in a while
commented 2016-11-20 15:11:49 -0500
LOL! @ “Banging the bark off the old oak tree”
commented 2016-11-20 14:59:15 -0500
Here is your answer, Marty.

“10 But the day of the Lord will come like a thief, in which the heavens will pass away with a roar and the elements will be destroyed with intense heat, and the earth and its works will be burned up.

11 Since all these things are to be destroyed in this way, what sort of people ought you to be in holy conduct and godliness, 12 looking for and hastening the coming of the day of God, because of which the heavens will be destroyed by burning, and the elements will melt with intense heat! 13 But according to His promise we are looking for new heavens and a new earth, in which righteousness dwells."
commented 2016-11-20 14:50:36 -0500
PETER NETTERVILLE said, “This world is in deep need of a good “cleansing”.”
Agreed, but how do we cleanse it? A world war, where all the crazies get wiped out?
The problem with that is too many innocent people will also die and the crazies will never be on the front lines. They are cowards at heart and will never risk their lives.
We have to hope that nature will take care of these idiots. Nature has a way of self cleansing.
Lets hope it happens sooner rather than later.
commented 2016-11-20 14:45:27 -0500
Bill you’re correct but only part way there. Here is the real issue:

Unbelief and Its Consequences
18 For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, 19 because that which is known about God is evident within them; for God made it evident to them. 20 For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse. 21 For even though they knew God, they did not honour Him as God or give thanks, but they became futile in their speculations, and their foolish heart was darkened. 22 Professing to be wise, they became fools, 23 and exchanged the glory of the incorruptible God for an image in the form of corruptible man and of birds and four-footed animals and crawling creatures.

24 Therefore God gave them over in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, so that their bodies would be dishonored among them. 25 For they exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen.

26 For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural, 27 and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error.

28 And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God any longer, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do those things which are not proper, 29 being filled with all unrighteousness, wickedness, greed, evil; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, malice; they are gossips, 30 slanderers, haters of God, insolent, arrogant, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, 31 without understanding, untrustworthy, unloving, unmerciful; 32 and although they know the ordinance of God, that those who practice such things are worthy of death, they not only do the same, but also give hearty approval to those who practice them."

Sound familiar?
commented 2016-11-20 14:27:16 -0500
Ey Yi Yi. Stupidity of the left never ceases!
commented 2016-11-20 13:58:26 -0500
Great insight, Bill Elder.
commented 2016-11-20 13:36:45 -0500
I’ll never be able to look at a buck scrape in the same light again……..hmmmm
commented 2016-11-20 12:22:28 -0500
The world has gone bat shit crazy.
commented 2016-11-20 12:13:37 -0500
If anyone wants to know why western culture is in decline (numerically and psychologically), you need look no further than the mass neurosis that fuels this type of social abnormality.

Why are we failing to reproduce? Because our young people are existentially miserable. Existential misery refers to concerns related to existence itself. People who are existentially happy believe they have purpose, that the world is basically good or at least not headed toward failure, and that they will have meaningful lives.

The core of the existential adjustment question lies the consuming idea of hope. Those who have realistic hope, meaning that things will turn out for the best based on the sanity and stability they see in their civilization, tend to thrive and be productive, happy and connected to the world around them.

On the other hand, those who lack hope and have pessimist opinions of their society tend to destroy themselves by failing to reproduce, self-sabotaging, and other behaviors of unhappy animals. This shows us that the central question regarding old stock North American people is why do our kids feel so hopeless?

Our young people are miserable, this is this is why we are dying out. Conservatives shut the door on the world, go back to work, pay their taxes and grumble to let off steam, then do nothing. Leftists find their ideological Utopia empty, and redouble their affirmation efforts. No one is happy with the situation, but because they are conditioned to social fragmentation by the media, they engage in bizarre “compensatory” behaviors or rituals which make the individual feel better about the world rather than attempting to change it.

Nowhere has this hit harder than with Generation X and Y. This is a generation who were the products of divorce and social breakdown. Generation X realized that they were going to be adults in a world without social order and behaved as such – Millennials grew up with this fatalistic world view.

It’s why you see them choosing to procreate with a piece of sod rather than be in a loving long term committed relationship and embrace family as the epitome of existentialist being – they feel it is pointless and there is no such thing – they have never seen it.
commented 2016-11-20 11:43:05 -0500
Bit of a correction there Mr Menzies, Joyce Kilmer was a he. Alfred Joyce Kilmer, who knows why he went by the Joyce. He was married, had 5 kids, and was killed in WWI.
Just a poet, nothing bent or weird.
commented 2016-11-20 10:26:46 -0500
Poor babies, I hope they can grow up someday. So confused.
commented 2016-11-20 10:06:14 -0500
Maybe they wanted to branch out? Or they just to a lichen to it? Just a little releaf for them.
Your reporting is, as always, tres amusante. Thanks David.