June 18, 2015

The Bard on a Blackberry: More aphorisms for today's world

Tim BallRebel Columnist

More of my aphorisms for the modern world:

Eventually all those people texting will end up writing Shakespeare’s plays. 

Rules designed to facilitate operations bring them to a halt when people work to rule.

The truth doesn’t need spin.

At what point does the thick skin required for leadership become completely insensitive?

To see yourselves as others see you just look at your reflection in a shop window.

Shakespeare’s works are a secular bible.

Is the spelling of dyslexia a cruel joke?

20/20 vision means you see 20 percent of things 20 percent of the time.

When someone says let me tell you the truth does it mean all they said before were lies?

The only thing bigger government provides is bigger and better corruption.

A flat Earth is better because you can push the idiots off the edge.

How mad are people when they die and find there is no heaven and they were good all their lives for nothing?

We should change the name of our planet from Earth to Water.

Why does a tank require a reverse gear?

Coffee is the socially acceptable drug from Colombia.

What was the greatest thing before sliced bread?

Only the good die young because they are not around long enough to misbehave.

They have it backwards: In the schools they are preaching not teaching and in the church they are teaching not preaching. 


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